I’m over this self-deprecating Rachel. I know everyone is sad. Where did that bitter lawn gnome go? I’m sure she’ll make guest staring appearances, but for now she’s on an extended stay vacation away from me. I’ll be sure to send you a box of Kleenex when I get a job because I’m just that nice of a person. This new Rachel is looking at life through macro-enabled contacts.
Ah, 1981. The best year in America or the best year to born according to me. Look at that – life before unemployment. Was it really that long ago? No. It wasn’t. And look at that — life after unemployment. Is it imaginable? Can there really be life after unemployment, Virginia? It looks to be like a resounding yes. Yes, there is life after unemployment. Only a blip in the timeline of Rachel.
These past few days I’ve allowed myself to succumb to all my fears and anxieties. I actually walked to the ocean yesterday. I know. What was I thinking? There is the vast emptiness, clear skies, the smell of the salt water, on a clear day you can see Hawaii — okay so the last one is just for the Barbra fans.
The trip to the ocean was party of an unemployment party. A day to stop looking for jobs and go outside. My fears were enveloping me and causing me to live in a state of accelerated heart beats (no sugar-free Red Bull needed). Rent, bills, recession, phone bills, no jobs to apply for, living off freelance and unemployment checks — it’s enough to want to crawl into bed and sleep forever. While I didn’t have a long conversation with the ocean, mostly it was a Hey, how’s it going? Good to see you. Sorry I haven’t called kind of conversation. It was enough to hit me upside the head and move forward. Yeah, life happens.
Life is not what it’s supposed to be. Its what it is. The way you cope with it is what makes the difference. Virginia Satir
Each day I roll with it with a little better. Just knowing that I’m defined by my actions makes me stronger. Besides, with my robot heart I’m living until 2181. Whose ready to RSVP for the party of the century — 2100 anyone?
